I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
