the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
