He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
