Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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