My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
