Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
So many bounce houses so little time
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
