I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
