hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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