I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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