Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
This is the high leading the old right now
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
