More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
