When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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