when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
