It's Friday. Sex?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
