She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Randomize
