Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
