hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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