Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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