Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
