I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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