i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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