How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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