Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
