My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
