so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
