dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize