i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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