you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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