I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
