That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
