i don't like sucking hair
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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