You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Randomize
