i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
