Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
