she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
