do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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