HIV tests are more positive than that guy
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
our cab driver is having phone sex.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize