i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
