You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
