So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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