i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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