how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
try to milk me bitch
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