Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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