no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
