My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize