drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize