I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
