belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
