I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
