So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Green mimosas i think yes
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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