Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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